Saturday, October 6, 2007

Passion? Let me think about it.

Thank you all for your comments. I find it very refreshing to hear from fellow authors.
It seems that you all have a common knack of seeing the extraordinary in the ordinary and the gift of being able to put the precipitating thoughts and moods into meaningful words for others to relish. I've decided that that is precisely what I love about reading books. I get to see through the unique glasses, telescopes and microscopes of others.

Yesterday, as I was driving my 900 kilometers, I spent some time pondering, and focused a lot on Ajoy's (September 28, 2007) comment (on my blog) about passion. I don't consider myself a passionate person, yet perhaps I am. I really love the richness of life, and seem to notice more flowers along its scenic path than many others I meet. One of the sweetest parts of my job is being able to witness the majority of sunrises and sunsets in a year. In many ways, I think they are like me as well as all of you. Same old sun and sky - day in and day out, yet every dawn and dusk is singularly unique and worth my rapt attention.

As I pondered the meaning of passion, I realized that I probably misunderstood the meaning. I looked up "Passion" and here are most of the synonyms - according to the Reader's Digest Family Word Finder:
emotions, feeling, warmth, heart, ardor, fervor, fire, intensity, sentiment, rapture, transport, ecstasy, intoxication, enthusiasm, earnestness, gusto, eagerness, vehemence, obsession, fancy, craving, urge, desire, hunger, thirst, idol, beloved, infatuation, flame, inamorata. Although I don't feel all these things every day, I do feel most of them - I guess I'm guilty as charged Ajoy.

In your comment, Ajoy, you asked, "How in the world do you live with such passion from day to day?" I hadn't really thought about it, but now that I have, that insightful question deserves an answer:
My life hasn't always been this way. Nearly fifteen years ago, my life hit bottom. It wasn't a trip and fall and scraped knee sort of thing, but more of a plunge down a deep, dry well with a face-first landing on the rough stone bottom. It was my own fault, and it was painfully obvious to me that I required a lot more than some fresh makeup on my face. It took a while, but eventually, I re-defined my life - for the better. Ever since then, I have tried to live life as if every day was my last. I haven't always succeeded in that, yet my day-to-day struggle along the path of life has carried me far. I feel a bit like the frog described by Boyd K. Packer - "You can't tell how high a frog will jump just by looking at him."

As a result of the profound changes to my mental and emotional habits, I lost my near-photographic memory, but I got benefits that outweighed the loss. I suppose that I am the same core person I always was, but today, my new mental and emotional habits allow my core person to interface with the rest of the world in a profoundly different way than I ever used to. To me, life is new every day. Each person I meet is a unique creation with as much value as I have. If I pay attention, I can learn something from anyone I meet. Today, I set goals and reach them. I am on the grand adventure of life, and who knows what awesome things I will discover today? How can I help but feel such passion? Look at what awesome things I would probably miss if I did not? ... Thank you for asking.


Candace Salima (LDS Nora Roberts) said...

Davis - I was brought to your blog from the post you made on Rebecca Talley's post about the loss of her sister-in-law. I lost my father in March and your words touched my heart deeply. Thank you.

I am delighted to have found you and look forward to visiting your blog often.

This post is marvelous . . . you have a real way with words, my friend.

Davis Bigelow said...

Thanks Candace. I much appreciate your comment. Loss of a loved one is like Elder Faust's comment about back trouble (made a year or two ago), "You either know what back trouble feels like, or you will." It is good that we don't all have to experience the pain of loss all at the same time. I know it has certainly helped me to think that so many others have coped well with what I would consider extreme tragedy. Knowledge of the fact that others have been able to overcome and move on has rescued me a time or two.

Tristi Pinkston said...

I love how you took your hard experience and allowed it to be the catalyst to change your life for the better. If we all did that with our trials, we'd be much better people.

Davis Bigelow said...

Thanks Tristi. I wish I could say that I had positively turned around every hard experience I've had, but sadly, I have not. However, I have learned that I shouldn't let that fact stop me from trying. Discouragement seems to be the enemy of positive growth, and to the degree I have resisted that enemy, I think I have moved forward. One day I'll get all the instruments in my orchestra to play harmoniously, but for now it’s still "rehearsal time".

Ajoy said...

It amazes me that you didn't recognize this fine quality in yourself. But then again, I have had others point out positive {and negative} things about me and to my astonishment they were right.

Sometimes it takes another from the outside to look upon us in order to see our true selves. It's actually a compliment to yourself that you didn't know you were such a passionate person Davis. Simply becasue you aren't focused on just YOU.

I can't help but remember a few years back when I hit 'rock bottom' myself and had to go to the Lord on bended knee to seek forgiveness. It was one of the hardest times in my life. Did it make me a better person from enduring it? No. What made me the better person was that I learned first hand who the Lord really was because I took the time to find out. Yes, it was the hard way- but I feel fortunate enough to have found out.

I feel like I am a passionate person myself. But I didn't come to this realization until someone had pointed it out to me as well! Funny huh?

I'm pleased to have been the one to point it out to yo and you realized another great quality about yourself. :) Isn't that what we are supposed to be doing in this life? Lifting others up and pointing them in positive directions.

Look to someone else today and point out a good quality they have. Maybe they knew it... maybe they didn't. But you did your part.

Ajoy said...

PS: This life is only "rehearsal time". Practice makes perfect!

Ainhoa said...

Hello, Davis.( I post my comment here because I don´t know how to do it in your latest posts). Your blog seems to be pretty interesting and I´ll take my time to read and enjoy it. I just wanted you to know that I already took a deep breath of Spanish air for you.

Davis Bigelow said...

Thanks ainhoa. You mentioned that you are writing a novel, what is it about and is it your first?

Ainhoa said...

Yes, this is my first novel,or my first try. I´ve written short stories and I got one of them published. The novel is about the lost of a brother. I know it is not a very happy subject but it gives me the opportunity to explore deep feelings. I´m pretty excited with the experience of writing a long story.

Davis Bigelow said...

Sorry it often takes me a long time to respond to comments. I drive a lot of hours every day and am usually in more need of sleep than responding. I think your novel sounds wonderful. I really enjoy writing about feelings. It seems we all have them, yet they can be so elusive. Please keep me posted about how it’s going. What stage are you at now?

Ainhoa said...

I´m about to finish the first chapter, trying to find the proper way to start the second one and spending too much time inside my head.
It has been a nice surprise reading about me and my blog in your last post; thank you very much for your words. By the way, I´m sure you don´t have to be worried about those rotten vegetables :)

Davis Bigelow said...

Sounds like you are having a good time with your baby. I have just joined a website where you write a 50,000 word novel in the month of Novemeber! Crazy eh? Well, I joined two days ago and already I have a full outline and charactor names. I think I might begin the actual writing tomorow.
Don't think too much, sometimes you have to just write so that youhave something more to think about.